Living In Fear

¨Life is but a mask worn on the face of death¨ -Joseph Campbell. 

Joseph Campbell's quote, that of a mask worn on the face of death, seems apt for the times we live in. Statistically, more than 25,000 people die of hunger each day in the world, the vast majority of these children. Coronavirus kills people with a compromised immune system, roughly 2% of those who are infected, and out of this margin, 2% approximately will die from the disease. It is well-known that people with other serious health risks or those of advanced age, or suffering from preexisting conditions such as diabetes or asthma are at a higher risk; other groups, such as pregnant women, obesity, smoking, heart-disease and sickle cell disease, as well. With a population of over one billion people, China had one million people infected, of which slightly over 5,000 died. In contrast, the U.S., with over 96 million people infected, had more than a million deaths. China's response to the virus, aided by the crackdown in the lockdown phase, also had a significantly fitter population. As it turns out, healthy carriers do not transmit the disease to the most vulnerable, as it was previously rumored.

The word "vaccine" traces back its etymological roots to the Latin word "vaca" (cow). Before the introduction of vaccination was understood, inoculation to smallpox occurred naturally among those infected by the much less severe cowpox virus. British scientist Edward Jenner championed the invention of the smallpox vaccine. In 1796, he inoculated his first test subject: an eight-year-old boy named James Phipps, by scraping the pus from Sarah Nelmes' hands, a milkmaid who had blisters from contracting cowpox. No one in recorded history has been attributed to having saved more lives than this fine physician. In the 20th century alone, the deadly disease is attributed to having killed off approximately 300 million people. The history of vaccination had begun.

Well known in advance that a pandemic would likely take place; it was rather a question of when, not if, it would take place. Coronovirus had up until that point a long documented history, as it was merely a new mutation of the Sars virus, renamed Covid 19 by the World Health Organization and ultimately reversed to SARS-CoV-2 by the International Committee on Taxonomy of Viruses. Like most infections, it is an opportunistic virus that affects more severely those with a compromised immune system, preexisting conditions such as diabetes, asthma, the elderly, and pregnant women. The elderly suffered the most since old age is but a period in life only domestic animals and humans reach, a period that is characteristically known for a myriad of ailments, as health significantly declines. Therefore, the elderly account for 80% of the fatalities.

As to the rest of us, we are told that we should wear a mask and wash our hands. It is well known by doctors and medical staff that the use of masks protects the patient more than it protects the user, even the reduction in childbirth mortality since hand washing was standardized. What we don't know is how constantly wearing a mask may impact the general health, if it is even necessary to wear at all times; if maintaining the six feet apart margin, especially in open areas, is of any use.

The emphasis is on the outdoors, where the incidence of contracting the disease may be perhaps lower, whereas, in our homes and intimate relationships, the advice generally consists of washing your face and hands. When the Bubonic Plague took place, one thing modern historians were quick to point out was the fact that people, out of fear, retreated to their homes and locked themselves inside. This proved catastrophic, as it helped the spread of the disease.

The air has never been cleaner than it is right now, and that is owed to the significant drop in human traffic, our way of life disappeared and suddenly we found ourselves, prisoners, at home. It is not well-known how the accumulation of mucus, moisture, and carbon dioxide on a piece of cloth covering our face could impact our overall health. What's become more apparent is the impact this ordeal has had on our mental state, especially in the youngest who cannot conceive of staying home as a plausible alternative. If there's a condition that can aggravate the onset of any disease is stress; no benefit comes out of stressing ourselves out, yet our way of life seems designed in such a way that foments stress. We do this by constantly televising the onset of tragic events unfolding on the news, depriving us of the freedom we enjoyed to mingle. It comes to mind the old adage: "Live free or die", attributed to general John Stark, 1809.

Are we really free? Isn't freedom such slavery? Thinking ourselves free, from what? To what end? Aren't we driven by the same impulses? Isn't "free" conditioned? Do we really have freedom to choose, if so why are we conditioned to choose the same thing again and again? We may choose to eat something different today, somewhere else, or invite someone over for dinner, maybe fast. Is this freedom? Well, there is such a thing as freedom, to an extent we have the ability to choose better at every moment, to do things differently, but it comes as no surprise that the vast majority of us choose to do the same thing. You may feel courageous by taking upon an advent, but what if you really stick to it for a week or two, maybe a month, and one day you go back. Is that really a sign that you're still the same? We are conditioned to be cynical: in movies, in songs, mostly it shows that we cannot change. It is true, change is difficult, and most people like familiarity, that's fine; some other people are daredevils, thrillseekers, adrenaline junkies, and if so is the case, doesn't that equates to the same? If you can expect the unexpected in someone, then that is particularly not a position of change. Change becomes too predictable, and it can get tiring, too radical to think in such way. Too much energy is required to assume such an attitude. Instead, life is a balance. How much fun can you have before you yearn for a little routine to settle in? If you are always on the go, sit and you'll find yourself in a different plateau. If you are the sedentary type, then you will be better served by a change of pace, something adventure is in place. Switching it up is the alternative to feeling alive, to make things interesting again. To err on the side of adventure and wonder may be the most desirable path, but we may already be part of a whole and as a member of a tribe, like that of family, a routine is not such a bad thing. Certainly, for an addict is not an option to spice things up and switch gears; but even if a relapse happens, it is best to take things lightly and start again, without the shame others may cast on or the guilt that it might arise as a consequence. Some people will often want to see you fail more than they want to see you succeed, so listening to others may not be any wiser than listening to yourself if it is the same message. It's the same if it's others' criticism or your own, you still end up with the same result. Of course, that is not to say that others may not contribute to your experience if it is constructive and nurturing, criticism sounds a lot like acceptance, and people like that you should definitely lend an ear to. It is the same siamese rule: you can't change others, and you can't let others change you. If it is with an open and honest heart, it will be done with the ears, as in a friend who listens to you. And that friend may well be yourself. Because the worse enemy you can envision, the one enemy you must overcome lies within.

The police have started to crack down on "illegal" parties breaking out all around the city of New York. The lockdown could've played a role in the large numbers of protesters showing up support for the black community throughout major cities around the world, following incidents of police brutality. Civil unrest started in Minneapolis, following the senseless death of George Floyd while in police custody.

The lockdown may have had played a role as well. People tired of being trapped in their homes found an opportunity to vent out their frustration in a worthy cause that afforded them the opportunity to feel a human connection again. Most of the protests were peaceful, looting and spotty confrontations did take place but considering the numbers of people on the streets and the conditions under which the protests were carried, not much to show. It is possible that the instigators were out to make genuine protesters look bad, there were social media reports among the youth of bottles conveniently left in places where there were going to be protests. In bad neighborhoods, looting did take place, even in good areas.

Is it fair to blame the police for the actions of a few? I have family members who are police officers, and while the actions that provoked the protests are grotesque, uncivil, inexcusable, systematic, the job of a police officer isn't easy. It is more of a problem in some states than others. After the success of these protests, a significant rise in crime was observed all throughout the nation.

Once you dwell in an environment where daily you encounter crime, it tends to affect the way you see others over time. It has an impact on you. If your job requires you to deal with the less privileged members in a society, and if the institutions that should in many of these cases overstretched, the police officer force finds itself in all sorts of social situations that should perhaps be delegated to other institutions in society, then the problem is systematic. It needs to be dealt with and protesting can be a way to call attention to the problem. It is inexcusable not to.

By April 2019, it was clear that this pandemic was serious enough. But it pales in comparison to its major predecessor, the Spanish Flu which in two years killed more than 50,000,000 people, 675,000 just here in the U.S., in a time where there were far less than us today, meaning it was far more lethal and similar measures were taken.

It may be a reason to reflect on how we live, restructure our priorities, do things differently. We live in fear, and that is not a good thing. The real killers out there, the reason people drop dead from one moment to the next are as follows: heart disease, strokes, and cancers. It is ironic, but the way we are told to lead our lives, that is in fear, creates more unnecessary stress which translates into more deaths. It also shows how our health system is organized in such a way that it foments disease, it seeks forward treating it though it is ill-prepared for it, as we’ve witnessed with this pandemic. Again, we are number one in the number of cases documented, in the number of deaths. Not only are we number one in this pandemic, but also in diabetes which increases the chances of contracting Covid19, a disease that we knew for years, but did nothing about it. Because it wasn’t profitable to do so. We get sick because, as a great book once read, “We live sickly.” 

It was Wayne Dyer who, in his first book Your Erroneous Ways, challenged the reader to reflect upon this question: “How long will you be dead for?” If you know the answer to that, it is a very long time, the time before you came into being and the time after you’re gone. But it is an illusion to think as well that the time in between, the one we actually spend alive, we actually spend it living. That is what makes Seneca so great, and one ought to see it splendidly explored in his writings.

We waste time when this is the most important thing we have. Life’s not short; our tempers are. We make irrational choices, lead impulsive lives. We spend time on nonsense, driven by an irrational fear that we will die if we do not take things so somberly. We will die, regardless, and what’s worse, we will die the worst of deaths, the one when we are supposed to be alive. We die each and every time we do as we are told, leading lives we do not want, working jobs we hate, comparing ourselves to others, trying to impress people who wouldn’t care if you dropped dead the next second. 

As Seneca said, life’s not brief, in fact, it is long enough. The reason that it seems brief is that we are wasteful. That’s true, too. It is more admirable still to know that life was literally a lot shorter back in his days. What I think we fail to realize in his writings sometimes is the anxiety hidden in between the lines. If you obsess as he did over these matters, it is because these matters were an obsession to you. They happen to be an obsession to everyone, but Seneca, like many other philosophers, sought to deal with it the best he could: by writing about it. Anger was another subject the great stoic philosopher dissected as well. Here’s my take on it: If there’s a good barometer to determine someone’s level of stupidity, it is their propensity to anger.

Not that you should find yourself angered by someone or a situation, that happens regardless of our best efforts, to varying degrees. Some seem imperious to bouts of anger, others are readily open and welcome any situation as an opportunity to anger themselves over it. Okay, so you lose your temper, you say things that you will regret later or maybe not. But the stupidest thing of all is holding on to anger, you may choose to create distance from the person, especially if they are unreasonable or seem to have anger issues, the farther the better. But usually, if you find yourself under the same roof, it is difficult. So, you realize that the experience of others does not determine ours, as some gurus like to claim. Well, I beg to disagree. Even the eloquent Seneca speaks unfavorably of anger, and for good reason. That you should do anything and everything within your power to not be the one who is in a constant search for it is good enough; that you should bow and let go every infraction, as some sages suggest, it may be easier said than done. Yes, we can manage to outmaneuver it more often than not, but the key thing is to not succumb to it wholeheartedly, to extricate yourself from the opportunity, and to create some distance and take some measures so that the next time around you can handle it even better. That is a more realistic prospect. It is said that anger is a temporary madness, and it is also true that we live in a crazy world, full of unstable people, people who are deeply disturbing, people who if they see that you are calm and in your own world, they would go out of their way to prove you wrong, to provoke you. Don’t let them, of course, they say; you work so hard for peace, and it is like second nature to you. You’ll be back to it, no doubt, so you let them have it. A little of the nastiness that they show will let them know that you’re not willing to put up with their antics, as opposed to adopting a solemn and honorable stance about being above humanity. You should avoid confrontation at all costs, but the best way about it is to learn how to dance your way through with a sort of no-nonsense kind of gracefulness, the kind that says that your patience is limited and be on your way the next minute. “Have a good day!” is a good way out of an unnecessary argument. “If you say so” is a passive-aggressive way to counter an unwarranted attack. Do not let them see that they have an effect on you. That’s the best strategy, to show that your cool is for those who earn it and that the rest of the world is beneath your light if all they show is their dark side. We all have a dark side, and casting a little bit of shadow will let others know the admission price. You do not need to adopt an attitude, just in a nonchalant way, go about your business and let them know that you won’t entertain their madness. 

When I ate more crap, I remember my anger being out of control. Not so much so that I could not function, I still held myself by the same principles exemplified here, but it was harder to commit. Anger lasted longer and it happened more often, not to the point that it was crippling, but it was far worse than it is today. And I say this because it is important to emphasize that the reason people feel anger may have to do with the choices they make, whether they have good sleeping habits, bad coping mechanisms, or simply just a miserable diet. You eat crap, you feel like crap, as simple as that. You don't sleep well, you age faster and age those who come across you with your misery. Instead of a mask, like Mr. Campbell proposes, life is a see-through veil that we lift to kiss our eternal bride, Death.